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Why is Sacramento (aka Sac) the capitol of California? Let’s boil down this long story to roughly 300 words. Give or take. Yeah, you can take your pick of big cities in the late, great Golden State. You’ve got San Fran in the north, LA in the south, and stragglers like San Diego and San Jose. So, right there that’s four massive cities Californians could have chosen from. Why Sac?

Enter the land of milk chocolate, Papal guards, and nifty pocketknives. Making his way to California by way of Switzerland, Johnnie Sutter got bit by the same gold bug that infected an entire nation. Westward, ho and all that jazz brought Johnnie and his family to what was a Podunk trading post in’39.

Good for you: two years of Spanish in high school have paid off. Sacramento is Espanola for “the Sacraments.” Was it a holy place? Maybe for some. For Johnnie and his son, it turned out to be a veritable money pit. Nix that. For Johnnie, Jr., it turned out to be a money pit. For Johnnie, Sr., it broke his spirit and sent him packing for Acapulco. Junior would thrive and Senior would tan.

Not only did the Mexican Empire lose the war with the U.S. in’48, they also managed to lose all of California. Fearing the Mexicans could bombard the then-capitol of Monterey, the provisional state government moved the capitol to San Jose. The problem was most of the legislature thought it was still vulnerable to the Spanish and Mexicans.

Fear does funny things to men. Running for their lives from an imaginary foe, the legislature moved the capitol to Vallejo, then Benicia, and finally to Sacramento. The year:’54. The reason: the Sacramento hotels, banks, brothels, and beau-coup access to the Sac River via steamboats. This meant state senators and house members could be shipped the length of the state — for the most part.

Yeah, ok, if you’re aiming to book it into some nice hotels Sacramento is the place to do it. Never mind the glitz of LA or the hippie chic of SF and get Sac-side.

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